Pining

I never thought I would write a blog; why would others care to read about what is going on in my life, who am I but another broken human being amongst God's creatures? But, today I feel compelled to write. God has done such marvelous things and it would be neglectful of me as His daughter to keep them to myself.

Today is Resurrection Sunday, the most important day of the year, the day that we celebrate Jesus' Victory! This morning, as I was engaged in the message of Christ's sacrifice, the Pastor asked (not in these exact words) how it is that we approach death; how is it that we mourn our loved ones? This was not the first time this week that I was faced with these questions. As I have been in remembrance of Christ's death and Resurrection this holy week, I have witnessed the death and resurrection of another.

Early on the morning of Good Friday I received a phone call from my mother that we needed to prepare for my grandmother's death. My reaction to this phone call was sad, yet peaceful. Two days earlier my disposition was quite the opposite. Wednesday my mother called to tell me that my grandmother was in the hospital with a broken hip, severe muscle damage, and kidney failure. This news struck fear in my heart. I did not fear because her life may end (as a Christian I know that this life is not the end); I feared for what was in store for her once she left this body. I have never known my grandmother to be a believer, she'd come to church to hear me sing now and then, but never to join in an altar call. So, my heart was breaking for thought of what was to be her fate. But, God's sovereignty was declared when I heard the story of what led to my her hospitalization.

Six days. That is how long my grandmother was alone on the floor of her home. She had fallen and broken her hip and for six days she was in pain, unable to move, unable to walk to the restroom, and unable to get food or water. My grams is a tenacious lady, one does not have to ask for sass for her to give it to them, and she has always been determined to rely on her own strength (I suppose these are qualities that she has passed down to all of the women of my family). So, when I thought of her helpless and alone for six days, I thought of how humiliated and weak she must have felt, and worse, I feared that this would give her more reason to further herself from God. But, then I heard her testimony. She said that the entire time she was on that floor, she spoke to God. She also said that He gave her a message. All that she would reveal of this message was one word, pining.


 There are those to whom every day brings them closer/further into death, then there are those to whom every day brings them further into eternal life. My grams is now one of the latter. The woman that was always 'in control of her own life' is now saying that her fate is 'in God's hands'! God uses what is necessary to reclaim the hearts of His children, for my grams it was six days of pain and helplessness, six days of pining. What began as a pining for health or relief ended in a pining for communion with God. God kept my grandmother alive, but more importantly he softened her heart and gave her life. No matter if her time in this body is one more day or one more decade, I give God the praise for the peace I have that she has accepted His invitation to live eternally with Him.

So, on this Resurrection Sunday I joyously proclaim that He is Risen and I have seen Him save His children from death!